Monday 9 September 2013

to confess my biggest regret...

This week's prompt over at My Home Truths is 'your biggest regret'... earlier this year I blogged about my blogging regrets, but today's regret is bigger and far more reaching than just in my blogging world.

I do try and live my life with a 'no regrets' attitude, and I truly love this quote....

and I do believe it, I do believe that I have made all my life choices based on what was best for me at the time...

I think anyone saying that they have no regrets is unrealistic...we ALL have something we regret; that hair cut/colour, that last drink, buying that top we didn't need, that speeding fine, eating that last slice of pizza when you were already full, not saying the one thing we wanted to say to that person before they walked out the door, what we did say to that one person before they walked out the door....

But my biggest life regret is one that I am only just starting to realise... I now work in a job where I work with High School students and part of the role is career advice and counselling. I help students through working out the best career for them, help them in picking the subjects that are going to get them to where they want to be and then help them with their choices beyond year 12, including university applications, applications for other colleges, workforce etc etc... when the students come and see me and talk to me about their futures and their dreams and their goals I get this amazing sense of excitement. They probably think that I have lost the plot as I get so excited and start googling madly and making phone calls on their behalf to make sure they get all the information that they need.

So how, you may ask, is this linked to my biggest regret..... I wish I had taken some more time deciding what I wanted to do with my life. I know that it's never too late and all of that but I think my biggest regret is not taking a gap year between school and uni and working out who I really am and what I really wanted out of life and just 'living' for a while! Even I find this a bit bizarre for me to say because it's not necessarily something I advise my students and again looking back, up until now, it's not something that I had thought of, but I do wonder where I would be now if I had of. I wish I had of travelled overseas perhaps as a Nanny or something similar. I have often thought about selling up and moving overseas even now as an adult, but something always stops me, mostly thinking about what I would miss while I was gone, but it never stops me thinking.....

 I suppose one of the values of hindsight is that I know the answer to the question...

"What if I did take a gap year and go overseas?"

The main answer to that is I wouldn't have all the friends in my life that I have now.... All my closest friends are friends that I have met at either University or at Schools that I have taught at. Therefore if I had of taken that gap year, if I had of lived overseas for a year, then these girls would not be in my life right now. If I had of taken that year off I would have a different life story so far and I am sure it would be a great one, but given that I can not imagine my life without my girls (you know who you are) I suppose, when all is said and done, I really can't regret the decision I made for it has given me exactly what I wanted...The BEST best friends a girl could ask for and how could I possibly regret that!!! xo

What are your biggest regrets???

Pop over to My Home Truths to confess or read other confessions!


  1. I'm actually enjoying the series Being Erica where Erica gets to go back and live out her regrets and see how things might have been different.

    I don't think I would want to go back and do over my regrets they were bad enough the first time round.

  2. I have thought about that myself - in South Africa there was no such thing as a gap year - guys were conscritped to the army and girls went to work or uni. I often wonder if I could have lived by myself - successfully having moved from home into A;s house when we got married. I wonder if I could have travelled and worked overseas. And then I look back and think no I couldn't have done those things but there is a teeny tiny part of me that says ... what if you had just taken the chance !
    Have the best day !

  3. My "regret" is similar - wish I'd been braver and done more travelling when I was young and single. But, at the same time, I know that I really wasn't in the right head space back then.

    Now I just look forward to travelling with the hubster as both our kids are nearly off our hands!

  4. I wouldn't have the friends that I do too if I hadn't made the decisions that I did. I have a necklace that my best friend gave me, that has 'crazy' engraved on it. It signifies that without us both being 'crazy' we would have never met.

    p.s we have a FB friend in common too! Jaime Scott.

  5. When I left school, I followed my parents advice. I was a people pleaser so for decades following, I did what was the 'norm' and what was expected of me. I often wonder where I would have ended up had I followed my own heart. All these years later, I have finally left 'the norm' and I am looking into my heart to see what would make ME happy. On saying that though...all those years led me to meet people I wouldn't have otherwise met and I have learned so many things and obtained so many skills. I think what is meant to be IS ... :-)

  6. I would love to pack up and go live overseas, but we don't have the right kind of job for that. YOU on the other hand, you could totally do something like that. Why not look into it?! Lots of places would take English-speaking teachers? I moved o/s at 18 and lived in the US for 11 years. I am so glad I did, but even I have times where I wonder what would have happened if I'd stayed here. I guess we will always wonder things like that, it's human nature. I love that you help kids think about what they want to do in the future. I remember having one meeting with a school counsellor and she basically had written me off as a lost cause b/c my grades were average. It's great you are excited about it and really want to help them. x Aroha

    1. Totally true Aroha, that's why I guess it's not really a regret but more a 'wonder what if...'
      thanks for stopping by again.

  7. I went straight from school to uni and full-time work and I do admit that I wish I could have travelled and perhaps had a few more experiences before settling down. But I would not be the person today otherwise so I can't really regret it too much!

  8. I have always somehow managed to combine both travel & work either via the yearly holidays or one time, worked my butt off to save for a year, then quit my job because I knew they wouldn't keep it for me. It is never too late to travel, I think you should go & do it.

  9. I have sometimes regretted not having the balls to do something similar, just take off overseas when I was younger like I see others doing. But in reality I'm just not the type to do daring, adventurous things so I'm coming to accept it. As you say, you wouldn't have all your great friends if you'd done things differently, so it's all good. xo

    1. yeah that's what I think too Ness! It's the packing up everything and going to an unknown that scares me! Am fine with going OS for a holiday, few weeks here, few weeks there kind of thing, but not sure I could do anything more than that.